Friends and solitude are two words, which go together, holding hands. I have felt it many times in the past twenty-five years. In these years I had been with friends, all the time, but the loneliness came creeping in every time I closed my eyes and saw where I was.
Equations have changed in the past couple of years. After I stepped out of home to find my existence, to earn my livelihood, things changed. I lost the company of my good old friends; solitude crept in, but I made many new ones. Got in touch with people, for many of which, I, my existence, become important.
But things changed again. As my old friends lost me when I stepped in the new world of self-dependence, I lost the new ones I made when they moved on. Solitary again...
By now I have been so used to this solitary mood of mine that it comes knocking in every now and then. And then I am forced to close my eyes.
Honey, as I call my soulmate, is co-incidentally my best friend as well. I know she would not believe this, I wish she would. She always asks me why I am silent. I don’t know. This silence has never left me, and it comes with all the more vengeance each time it goes…
Any answers, anyone?
Equations have changed in the past couple of years. After I stepped out of home to find my existence, to earn my livelihood, things changed. I lost the company of my good old friends; solitude crept in, but I made many new ones. Got in touch with people, for many of which, I, my existence, become important.
But things changed again. As my old friends lost me when I stepped in the new world of self-dependence, I lost the new ones I made when they moved on. Solitary again...
By now I have been so used to this solitary mood of mine that it comes knocking in every now and then. And then I am forced to close my eyes.
Honey, as I call my soulmate, is co-incidentally my best friend as well. I know she would not believe this, I wish she would. She always asks me why I am silent. I don’t know. This silence has never left me, and it comes with all the more vengeance each time it goes…
Any answers, anyone?
Well-written and touching. However, I am sure you know this too that the cure for solitude and loneliness is NOT silence and solitude...but laughter, noise and happiness....
ReplyDeletei agree with TDIC, so venture out meet more people and get rid of that silence :-)
ReplyDeleteTo TDIC, I see not the laughter but the silence that will follow, not the noise but the solitude that fills the silence in every noise. Am I cynical or a pessimist? No, I am just trying to learn this new dimension of life.
ReplyDeleteTo DM, I don't know if you have read Rabindra Nath Tagore's 'Postmaster'. If u haven't then please find a copy and read and you would know what I told TDIC.
cheers,